Difficult People
Until things got hard at work, I had always considered myself good at
handling difficult people. I knew just how to deal with difficult
people, in fact. I was polite with them, I did not let them get under my
skin, and I walked away. Dealing with difficult men when you can't walk
away, however, is something else entirely, as I was soon to find out.
Everyone at some point or another has to deal with a difficult person at
work. Perhaps it is someone who always talks and has no idea how to
listen. Perhaps it is someone who is always on the defensive and they
think that everything that you say is targeted towards them as an
attack. Whatever the difficult persons issues are, you can bet that you
won't be able to avoid conflict with them.
Difficult people make causing conflict their specialty. No matter how
good you are at resisting, they will find a way to get under your skin.
Sometimes, the people difficult use passive aggressive techniques. I had
a friend who had some difficult employees who were just like this. They
made it difficult for you to point to anything that they did and tell
them that it was wrong. They were difficult people because they always
found subtle ways of misunderstanding what you were saying and screwing
it up.
In my case, the person was extremely hostile. I have always been good at
handling people with anger problems. I simply stay out of their way, and
let them storm around in their own cloud of anger. This is a lot more
difficult, however, when you are dealing with difficult people who are
right next to you all day long. We had adjoining cubicles, and no matter
what I would do, I was always getting on Rick's nerves. He would find a
reason to shout at someone almost everyday, but because the boss liked
him, he couldn't be fired. He was one of the most difficult people I
have ever had to deal with, in fact.
Finally, I went to a business coach who told me all about handling
difficult people. The key was not, as I had thought, to stay out of
their way. Rather, the key was confidently facing the difficult people
who have been causing your problem. Difficult people, you see, are often
bullies. They thrive on making people move out of their way. If you face
them, they will be quick to back down.
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